A reader writes:
My father-in-law was visiting over the weekend. He began speaking about how my brother-in-law is job-hunting to flee new firm possession.
At one among my brother-in-law’s interviews, the employer requested to speak to his spouse (my sister-in-law, who isn’t employed and cares for my three younger nephews).
I used to be so shocked that I exclaimed, “They will’t try this!” Properly, I suppose my remark offended my father-in-law as a result of he raised his voice and mentioned again, “What do you imply they’ll’t try this?!”
I mentioned what if the candidate was a single mother with youngsters? My father-in-law snapped at me, saying the employer desires to guarantee that my brother-in-law’s spouse “is on board.” (He missed my level that not everybody who works is a married man.) I dropped the dialog and mentioned nothing extra after that, as a result of it wasn’t price combating over it in entrance of my daughter and husband.
So now I’m questioning, is it okay for an employer to ask to speak to “The Spouse” earlier than hiring? It appears very outdated to me. It’s like they wish to know that she’s going to agree to supply free childcare so my brother-in-law can work as many hours as the corporate desires.
It’s a very retro and outdated apply.
And I’d like to know whether or not they’re asking to speak to feminine candidates’ spouses, as a result of I wager they’re not.
Some years again, I had an fascinating dialog with Suzanne Lucas of Evil HR Woman about corporations that ask to fulfill the entire household earlier than providing a job that might contain transferring to a brand new nation (one thing Suzanne herself has achieved; she and her youngsters moved to Switzerland when her husband took a job there). She made a great argument for why it is sensible in that state of affairs — the job received’t work out if the household is sad within the new nation / doesn’t wish to transfer — however that’s very completely different than interviewing for a job domestically.
My guess is that the reason is without doubt one of the following:
* Your brother-in-law is interviewing for a high-up govt function the place his partner might be anticipated to play extra of a task in his profession and/or the corporate is more-than-usually invested within the character of the executives they rent and suppose assembly his partner will give them perception into whether or not they’d be snug having him as representing their firm.
* The function is comparatively senior and so they wish to be certain his partner is on-board with what the calls for of the function are anticipated to be. (Usually that is one thing that the corporate would convey to the candidate and let the candidate discuss with their partner about, however once more — retro.)
* The corporate thinks of themselves as “family-oriented” and that is a part of that.
In any case, it’s fairly bizarre, and your father-in-law seems like a tough in-law (not as a result of he doesn’t discover it bizarre, however as a result of he took it personally to the purpose of snapping at you about it).
